Children, Trauma, & How to Help Them Cope

Childhood is supposed to be a time that is carefree and fun. It’s a time of learning, growing physically and developmentally, and not having any worries overall. Unfortunately, this isn’t the experience that all children have.

When you are a caregiver, teacher, or parent of a child who has gone through something traumatic, you want to help them in any way you can.

While helping a child through trauma is hard, it is definitely possible.

Understanding childhood trauma

Before helping a child cope with trauma, it’s important to know what causes it. Trauma can encompass a wide range of experiences, including:

  • physical, sexual, or emotional abuse

  • neglect

  • poverty

  • car accidents

  • injury or prolonged illness

  • natural disasters

  • witnessing violence

  • experiencing the loss of a loved one or pet

Children may react to a traumatic event in various ways depending on their age, personality, and the nature of the event. Some might not seem affected at all; others may show many signs of having been through trauma. There is no one-size-fits-all response, and each child will cope in their own unique way.

Signs of trauma in children

Recognizing the signs of trauma in children is the first step in providing them with the support they need. These signs may manifest in various ways, including:

  • behavioral changes, such as becoming clingy, aggressive, or withdrawn.

  • regression, which can show up as thumb-sucking or bedwetting.

  • avoidance of people or places associated with the traumatic experience.

  • emotional distress, such as sadness, anger, or guilt, which might be expressed through outbursts or play.

  • physical symptoms, such as stomachaches or being unable to sleep.

How to help children cope with trauma

Create a safe environment

They should see your family and their home as their safe place. Make sure they know you’re the person they can talk to. Support them with love and encouragement. Respond to their needs so they can form a healthy, secure attachment to you. Provide reassurance by letting them know you’re here to support them.

Keep a routine

Part of creating a safe environment means ensuring they have a consistent schedule. Keep mealtimes and nighttime routines at the same time each day. Try not to spring any new responsibilities on them.

Validate their feelings

If they’re going through a variety of emotions right now, they might feel embarrassed or unsure how to handle themselves. Let them know it’s okay to feel what they’re feeling. Don’t blame them for the event—make sure they know it’s absolutely not their fault. Encourage them to try to name their emotions and express them through crafts and play.

Make life fun

For kids to get back to a normal baseline, they need to feel playful. Take your kid to their favorite parks, natural history or children’s museums, or encourage them to play sports. Give them activities to look forward to, especially if they provide an outlet for their emotions. Join them in play at home so they can feel more connected with you.

Be patient

Your child may have good and bad days. Depending on how they’re responding to the trauma, it might take them a long time to recover. There’s no set time for healing from trauma, so don’t expect them to be better by a certain point. If they feel upset by a setback, let them know it’s okay.

Encourage healthy coping strategies

When your child has big feelings, encourage them to let them out healthily. Try dancing, drawing, journaling, or playing outside. Take them for walks in nature. Sometimes, distraction can help, so keep their favorite book or movie on hand to turn to.

Has your child experienced a trauma?

Some children bounce back from a traumatic experience with ease. Others, however, may struggle to return to normal. If your child continues to show signs of being deeply affected by trauma, consider getting them into therapy. A child therapist can help your child recover from trauma by using a child-focused approach. This might mean incorporating play therapy, teaching them distress tolerance, and encouraging talking through their feelings.

To find out more about how child therapy can help children cope with trauma, please reach out to us.

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